Last few days I couldnt help seeing brothers and sisters in various threads conduicting themselves in a way which to an outsider may seem like 'flirting' or loose talk or idle talk. All of these are decisively forbidden (Haraam) in Islam. I have my adopted opinions on limits of discussion between a guy and girl who are non-mehram to each other, but I am not going to impose my views or opinions on anyone, since the onus is on every individual Musilm who comes here to know the shariah ruling as regards to interenet discussions especially with opposite sex. If someone has not thoroughly understood an islamic ruling on this, I seriously urge them to do so.

Inshalah I will not impose my views, but rather share a concern as an Ummah member and your brother in Islam. As we know the general section of the forum is open for public viewing, there are times when all the thread in the first page of general have absolutely no relationship with Islam whatsoever. I can understand and appreciate that it can be a nice place for brothers and sisters to have discussions on whatever is on their mind and alhamdulilah its a good thing, I too use it for that purpose to chill out. But I fear that some thread are complete waste of time on behalf of the user, this is entirely up to them as it can be Fun but if we view this from accountability point of view ..we will be asked about every minute we spend of our life. At times we dont realise but time flies on Ummah forums.

The other issue is of Shubh (doubt) its absolutely haraam for a Muslim to cause doubt on thier own character or character of another Muslims in a bad way. So sisters saying stuff like 'aww bro you are so sweet' in a thread possibly viewed by thousands of Muslims and non-Muslims...what kind of feeling will it leave with them? People get upset seeing sisters smoke which is not even haraam, but have no problem with using this kind of language towards a grown Muslim man and I have seen bros do the same towards sisters.

There are some thread where a bro and sis endlessly talking about somethign they did and their private life. Occasionally its good, we can get to know eachother.. fair enough. But it kind of kill the credibility of that indiviudal to the extent even if he says something serious it doesnt carry weight... because you dont have to be cila black to know who is flirting and churpsing here. This issue has been raised by some of the admins in the past, I even remember discussing this with one of the admins who was of the opinion that anything irrilevant to Islam is idle talk therefore haraam, I even debated the definition of idle talk without realising how bad the problem actually is.

At the end of the day, the goal of every Muslim is to better ourselves and take ourselves closer to Allah Tala, its a wonderful place to achieve this. But not the right place to express private personal or somewhat intimate emotions even if its with good intentions, this can be done in private because then what you talk and discuss is between you and Allah tala.

We might think "well, I dont care what other people think of me, they dont have the right to judge me, only Allah tala knows my intention...." but with this issue this argument is invalid because the issue of causing suspicioun upon oneself or for others is clearly haraam and inevitably it is this fear of causing doubt which protects an islamic society.

Allah tala says: "Oh you who believe! Avoid much suspicion (zann), indeed some suspicions are sins." al-Hujuraat:12

Ibn Abbas said in the Tafseer of this Ayah: "Allah Tala forbade the believers from thinking badly of another believer."

Abu Hurrairah narrated that the Prophet (saw) said: 'beware of suspicion for suspicion is the most mendacious of talk."

Therefore to think badly of a believer who is apprently good and upright is not alowed. Rather it is recommended that one thinks well of him. As for the Muslim who on the surface looks dubious then it is allowed to think badly of him due to the hadith of Sayeda Aisha reported by al-Bukhari where she said: the Prophet of Allah said: 'i dont believe so and so people know anything about out deen.' In another version 'I dont believe so and so people know anything about the Deen we follow.' al-Bukhari said: al-Layth bin Sa'd said the two men were from the hypocrites.

Imam Tirmizi, and ibn Hibban reported as Hasan Sahih from Hassan ibn Ali (ra):
"Leave that makes you doubt from that which does not make you doubt."

'Aatiyah b.'Urwah as-Sa'di narrated that the messanger of Allah (saw) said:
"No one can achieve the height of piety till he forsake those practices in which there is no sin merely to guard himself against those which have sin in them."

Abu Umamah said: A man asked the prophet (saw) what is a sin? He said: If someone wavers in your soul, so leave it. He asked what is Imaan: "if your good deeds make you happy and your bad deeds make you sad, then you are a believer."

The prophet (saw) said in a hadith: "I guarantee Paradise to anyone who guards what is between their Jaw and what is between their legs."


Jazakallahu khayr for reading.

none of this is my personal preference, its an Islamic reminder firsly to myself and anyone else who cares about thier modesty.

If I said good its from Allah Tala and if I made a mistake its my mistake and from the shaytaan.

May Allah Tala save me from Riyaa'. Allahuma Ameen

Your brother in Islaam

PS please find link to a more detailed discussion on this issue, when it was first raised as a concern by a dear brother of mine.

http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?t=51356&page=1&pp=20